Listen

Christine said I could
Believe again
Repeatedly.
I've become a Naturalist,
Not unlike the suicidal heroines
of last century,
Thwarted in love
And starving for intake.
I throw my arms open
For fate to rape me.
 

Militia Hill Road

A poetic coven
Erased the stop sign from our
Minds on Militia Hill Road.
We careened down the hill
Like Washington with heart
And cried
scared wet teary thrill eyed
At the bottom.
 
 
 
 

The Situation

The situation arose
When I was in the kitchen
Across the country
Or the universe.
I'm sad that it happened
And sorry that it came,
Knowing the impossibilites
At fort.
I did mean to fight that day,
Dirty faced like a man.
I bore it alone, inside, actor-style.
I'll understand next time,
And pretend I'm a mother child.
 
 
 
 

Choir Boy II

I don't know you
And my name to you is
"The girl on the end of the first soprano row."
I watch my friends depart
Love ruined-
And watch your heart,
Wanting you to know no more
But kiss me nonetheless.
 
 
 

Decent Character

You're a man of
Decent character
(You're a man?)
Who loves to
Upset her
(and me?)
You're a well of
Teary lonliness
With popular school spirit
(RAH RAH!  GO TEAM!)
So you'll meet
and marry there
and I'll attend your wedding
Alone.
 
 
 

You Have To Be An Actor

Part two,
DRAMATIC LAMENT!
Don't ask me about the professional,
The environmentalist who fucks styrofoam,
Or the probably drunken baseball star.
You're standing there on stage,
Professional actor drinking out of styrofoam like a star
And I desire nothing more than the culmination
Of keepsake memories.
 
 

I Can Write You A Poem

To cover your pain.
I will bring up my past
So that you may rain.
Crooked smiles do hide
A single man insane.
A single man
Insane
 
 

Damn

Damn him for letting love
Penetrate.
Damn him for naming the
Word.
Damn fate,
Gestating hole bored
Dead child eyes
For me within her womb.
For me within her womb.

Damn him
For standing on two feet again.
Damn myself
For leaving.
 
 
 

Failure

Is a poem half drafted
Falling into paints
Mixed in three different
Beds.
Care is my wasted time
On you.
 
 
 

Kirdneh

Kirdneh's on the stage!
All nudge and point!
Not at he but the fool
              who desires such drama again!
She watches, background
Thirsty with zeal and jealousy.
Hush!
Kirdneh's on the stage!
All nudge and point!
         I believe he is only human
Too and his mistakes, he falters,
Are tender.
 

What Fool

What fool I mortal was!
Watching myself from a glass
Crooked and leaning on the wall.

Mirthly Virtue, at a distance,
Is unaware of the failings of the
Heart,
Is unaware of the catacombs it
Bears,
Is undisturbed by the silence it
Betrays.

What fool I am to touch the nail
Upon his hand,
Believing it to be unnoticed
And knowing my lines,
A memory as my design
To marry.

It's a secret!  Honesty is
Prey in the Nacirema forest--
Pray in the Nacirema forest
For yourself!

What fool I mortal am!
 
 
 

Heart's In New Jersey

Nothing grown in Lancaster but
Corn and dead weeds fervent.
My heart liked getting lost on
I-695
And I left it in
New Jersey
 

untitled

Somewhere in the woods
Was a secret meeting;
Elsewhere on a date was
my love.
Pity that I never get asked to dance
So I'll sleep with the guitar tonight
And distort the
window wind
 
 
 

Eve Minus Adam

In front of the mirror,
Not fat nor thin.
A bit too much vodka
But not enough gin.
Hair long
Eyes set
Supple, silent
Goals met.
I am proud.
I am Eve.
 
 
 

Owner

Says the right hurtful things
To abusively
Own me.
And he says I play the pity game-
He on his date while I sang and there sat my other,
Proudly staring at the floor
Wondering who I wrote the music for.
 
 

Pictures

Wanted to take a picture
Every day and send it
to you.
One day in a dress,
The next tired
like now
and bemused.
Finally one day I was going to
Flash you.
Then I took webcam off of my Christmas list.
 
 
 

Things I Want

I stopped wanting the clothing
You intended to send.
Now it's poems, quotes, moments
Dreams
and for you to see these lights
and candles sparkle,
reflecting in my eyes
and dashing in the
wind.
 
 

For My Friend Tim

Papers pouring like
machine driven mad-
I'm finished.  Leaving Friday
Will send word from
Home and our cafes.
You warmed my spirits tonight
Like tea at your house,
With an ice cube
And games until midnight.
 
 

She Only Cares

She only cares about what he looks like;
Her perfect GPA and pity earned degrees.
I only cared about what he felt like
He follows her still with blood on his knees
Or was that blood from a painting
That he created?
for me?
 
 
 

Dublin

I have to be sad,
So I wish us in Dublin
On the off chance that candlelight and rain
Will make you sleep
So I may watch
And sing.
 
 
 

Candy Canes

'Tis the first season
That eating
candy canes,
--swirl swirl--
is thought of
as my
sexual
act.
 
 

People Leave

It wasn't your fault.
Tired friend,
People leave.
I watched a faulty marriage.
Tired friend,
People leave.
People work
People talk
People screw
and people leave.
I'd love to burn UTAH
Right now in a gesture of peace.
Tired friend,
People leave.
I didn't mean to give you guilt
But it's been years that I've
Shouldered love.
 
 

Here

Here's a gift
And I don't know what I'm doing here
I don't know why I'm standing here
Smiling, typing
frowns.  Sinking, typing
Hope.  Hoped to write you a song but
They were sad and out of stock and I couldn't
Buy a new one.
But if you ever want me and I'm still
Here,
Here's a gift.
 
 

There

Spoiled there I am,
A man falls at my feet
(I notice his long hair),
And I want to touch the one that
Falls for my voice.
(Leaps to death in woe for me),
Spoiled there I am,
But not quite there.
I'm here.
 
 

Chocolate Lust

Chocolate lust,
you waited up just to
talk to me
in jazz.
Relax,
Yeah I'll sing for you
Canary baby canary,
My comfort lure
Like silken sea atop your
piano in a black and red
dressing.
 
 

Thanking You

Sitting among ruins of records and
Songs that always mean something,
Two eyes like snowflakes leak in
Silent solitude of togetherness
in your hands.
The fall with the melody, and rise again
On the curvature of a smile,
Now found and warmed through all that you
Send.
 
 
 

Shooting Star

I watched a dream fall into my
Hand tonight,
And thought of rain as proud
and strong.
None of this compared to the
Warmth, care and sincerity
Present simply in your
Song.
 
 

For Tomorrow

My lips need to be kissed,
And you smoked that cigarette to the end,
like a joint.
I watched your lips.
My hand needs to be held,
And you played that piano until I was jealous,
Desiring.
Our song needs to be written,
So I thank you for tomorrow
In advance.
 
 
 

Smoking Sense

I wanted to smoke some sense into myself
So I kissed him pot breathed
And he touched my breast
Like sober candy.
We lived then, before, and after.
Single deaths and depths I forsee
Not smoked or smelt or dealt
Or felt,
Just created in Musical Ecstacy.
 
 
 

Here the Trees

Here the trees grow branched and
witchy in the wind.
It's starting to snow
Cold
Without you.

Hear the trees sing branched and
Strong in the sunlight.
It's starting to snow
Warm
With you and cocoa.

Thank you for the song
And the kiss.
 
 

My Hero

My hero has these eyes
That caress my face and
Feel like sunlight,
Innocent and calming-
internal monologue.
My hero makes disappear these fears
That play like shadows at my heels and
Feel like darkenings,
Sinning and impure-
External dialect.
My hero is proud of me,
And I of him.
Sound is touch.
 

 Writing Main